World Poverty,

If you are young then we can maybe advise some thought on becoming an adult - or if you are older then we can maybe advise some thought on becoming a better person. We can change ourselves, and we can have some control over how we change. And you can have a better life by making yourself a better person, though there may well be limits to your options. It is always the better people who have better relationships, and train-wreck people have only train-wreck relationships.



Different people are largely different bunches of habits - and mostly habits picked up in childhood from family and friends. Some of the habits we have picked up may not really suit us and some may be unhelpful or even unhealthy habits. But habits can be changed successfully.

Take a close look at yourself and your life, and you should be able to recognise that you have at least one or two habits that are not very good - and maybe that you are missing one or two good habits as well. One simple example might be smoking cigarettes and that being unhealthy and expensive. When you can clearly see that you have some bad habit, then you can try to end it.

You can try just using your willpower to stop bad habits, or you can try replacing a bad habit with a less bad habit. If you find that simply stopping smoking nicotine cigarettes is too hard, then try replacing that with chewing nicotine gum or sucking nicotine mints which will be a healthier and cheaper habit. (note, your stomach may not like their higher-nicotene versions)

You can also try just using your willpower to start good habits, or you can try replacing a bad habit with a good habit. If you find that regular workout exercise is too hard, then try just replacing short drives with walking. Tell family or friends what you are doing, and that will help you stick with the improvement.

If you really think about yourself, then you can recognise your own personality habits - and you may think 'that is who I am'. But these are also habits that you can change, and you can make you a better more successful you. - around personality habits like ;

1. Trustworthy - Untrustworthy, be as trustworthy as you can - do what you promise.
2. Honest - Dishonest, be as honest as you can by not stealing or cheating.
3. Open - Secretive, be as open as is practical and fully open with a partner.
4. Trusting - Sceptical, be as trusting as is practical.
5. Tolerant - Intolerant, be as tolerant as is practical.
6. Generous - Mean, be as generous as is practical.
7. Sensitive - Coarse, be as sensitive as is practical.
8. Kind - Callous, be as kind as is practical.
9. Brave - Fearful, be as brave as is practical.
10. Leading - Following, be yourself mostly and fit in with company when practical.
11. Quiet - Boisterous, be yourself mostly and fit in with company when practical.

Changing yourself for the better can take time, and it may have to be done step by step. The first thing has to be recognising clearly where habits need to be changed. So you can start with the first on the list above and work your way down the list.

On each one consider and watch carefully what you are actually doing now and consider if it needs improving or not. Work on the first habit that needs improving, and tell family or friends what you are doing since that will help you stick with the improvement.

Then consider the next thing on the list above, and soon you will become a more successful adult or become that better person.

(And maybe you could learn a bit more by increasing your science knowledge ?)

Hang-ups about things including sex are common and can be relatively minor, but they can for some be major and make relationships very difficult. Mostly such hang-ups relate to aspects of our childhood and might concern for example the strictness of our parents or our school or other experiences.

However our own memories of our childhood can be very partial and can be very unreliable.
This is basically because of two things ;
1. The mind can blank-out, or repress, some childhood memories that it finds unpleasant or negative for some reason.
2. The mind can imagine, or invent, some false childhood memories that it finds pleasant or positive for some reason.
And for a child, reasons need not make as much sense as adult reasons - they can sometimes be 'silly' reasons.
And 'unpleasant' can include some pleasant, or 'pleasant' include some unpleasant.

A good example concerns learning to walk. When we are learning to walk it involves a good deal of falling down and hurting ourselves before we finally master the art of walking properly. It is very rare for the fallings and hurtings to be remembered, and indeed few clearly remember any of the learning-to-walk process. This memory problem is not due to age because the same holds for older children learning to ride bicycles. While conceptual memories that are substantially negative may be blanked-out or repressed, any physical memories involved do remain active. You wake each morning and can walk, or can ride your bike - the physical memories have not been blanked-out or repressed. The only truely reliable childhood memories are these physical memories. If your memory of something in childhood is unclear, then either little happened or some of what happened has been blanked-out. If you think that you DO remember learning to ride a bike as a young child, it can only be a true memory if when older you COULD ride a bike without more learning.

As adults people can have hang-ups based on true childhood memories or on false childhood memories. It is possible to overcome any hang-up, though some may be difficult. The problem is basically the same as overcoming a phobia like fear of spiders. It helps if you can reason through the hang-up with maybe a parent or close friend until you can decide if for you it is irrational and you can face it down or if you can and should stick with it as an OK hang-up. In the end it is for you to decide who you want to be, and you can do that best if you are well informed rather than misinformed so do try to not let any claimed 'expert' misinform you about you or your childhood. As Freud documented, children can develop strong curiosity about the opposite sex that even unfulfilled can lead to selective memory repressions which may later give them very wrong supposings about their childhood.

Hear '99 Red Balloons' on one reason to become the better person without hangups ...

.. (maybe up volume or unmute)

PS. And of course a government or government system can also have hangups and a need to become better government.

AND if you run a website or blog, you are welcome to link to this site.